shaliya

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i use to be half now i am whole. i use to walk inside my shadow and now it walks outside of me
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WHEN I MET YOU I COULND'T STAND YOUWHEN I MET YOU I DID ALL I COULD TO STAY AWAYWHEN I MET YOU YOU ALMOST MADE MY SKIN CRAWLAND NOW...........OH MY GOD IS ALL I CAN SAY!!I LOVE YOU WITH ALL OF MY BEINGI DO ALL I CAN TO BE IN YOUR ARMS AND FEEL YOUR LIPSI WIGGLE AND LONG FOR MORE AND MORE OF YOUR TOUCHOUR PATHS CROSSED IN A VERY ODD WAYAND NEITHER ONE OF US CAN FIGURE OUT WHYNOW I DON'T CAREYOU ARE INTOXICATINGBETTER THEN ANY DRUG I HAVE EVER HEARD OFYOU KEEP ME SPINNING IN A WORLD OF PERFECT PASSIONYOUR TOUCH MELTS MEYOUR SMILE MAKES ME GIGGLEOUR LOVE MAKING TAKES MY BREATH AWAY FOR DAYS AT A TIMEI HAVE AN UNEXPLAINABLE PASSION INSIDE OF MY THAT GROWS EVERY DAY FOR YOU AND ONLY YOU. IT MAKES MY BODY TINGLE AND  GASP FOR AIRIT IS BETTER THEN MY FIRST SCHOOL GIRL CRUSHIT IS BETTER THEN MY WILDEST DREAMI HAVE AN UNEXPLAINABLE PASSION INSIDE OF MY THAT GROWS EVERY DAYNEVER COULD I HAVE EVER IMAGINED OR DREAMEDTHAT CROSSING YOUR PATH WOULD STOP MY WORLD WITH A JOLT IN SUCH A WAYTHAT MY BODY,SOUL, AND BEING WOULD NEVER TAKE ANOTHER STEP IN ANY DIRECTION OTHER  THEN  YOURS...........YOU ARE MY ONE TRUE LOVE, MY UNEXPLAINABLE PASSION 

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I WAKE UP EACH DAY NOT KNOWING WHO I AM OR WILL BE.I WAKE UP AND MY WARDROBE IS A CLOSET FULL OF MASKS, NOT CLOTHES.I NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE EMPTY HANDED. I ALWAYS CARRY MORE THEN ONE.I AM NEVER UNPREPARED.MY HAIR NEVER CHANGES AND MY EYES STAY THE SAME.BECAUSE OF THIS PEOPLE THINK THEY KNOW ME INSIDE AND OUTI HIDE NOT JUST FROM OTHERS BUT FROM MYSELF AS WELL.I DECEIVE NOT JUST OTHERS BUT MYSELF AS WELL.I HAVE LEARNED TO LOCK OTHERS OUT, AND MYSELF AS WELL.MY MASKS, MY FRIENDS, MY SAVIORS, MY COMFORT.THEY CARRY ME THROUGH EACH DAY AND DO NOT LET ME COME IN HARMS WAY.THEY GUARD ME WHEN NEEDED,THEY SMILE FOR ME WHEN I DON'T WANT TO,THEY ARE MY SILENCE WHEN I FEEL RAGE,THEY ARE WHO I AM BECAUSE I AM NO LONGER ME.I MAKE SURE TO STAY UNKNOWN TO OTHERS THIS WAY I NEVER HURT AND EVEN WHEN IT DOES IT NEVER SHOWSWHEN THOSE OTHERS GET TO CLOSE FOR COMFORT I SLYLY, NEVER LETTING THEM KNOW IT,JUST GO THE OTHER WAY.MY MASKS, MY FRIENDS, MY SAVIORS, MY COMFORT.TO ALL I STAY UNKNOWN, EVEN TO MYSELFMY COLLECTION IS LARGE AND BROAD TO COVER IT ALLI JUST WISH THAT I COULD FIND THE ONE THAT TRULY FITS,I WISH I COULD JUST FIND THE REAL ME 

, , , #dark, , #hate, , , #pain, , , #empty, , #lies

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TODAY I LAYED MY EYES UPON YOU FOR THE FIRST TIME.SPEECHLESS. I COULD FIND NO WORDS TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS AND THOUGHTS.YOUR SKIN IS PINK AND ROSY AND YOUR EYES ARE PERFECT DIAMONDS.YOU SMILED, AND JUST THAT SIMPLE ACT TOOK MY BREATH AWAY.SO LITTLE AND FRAGILE. AND YET YOU COMPLETE MY LIFE IN SO MANY WAYS.YOUR PRESENCE HAS SUCH AN ENORMOUS IMPACT ON SO MANY IN SO MANY WAYSMY DAUGHTER YOU ARE BEYOND ALL PERFECTIONYOU MAKE THE STARS SHINE BRIGHTER AND STRONGERYOU ARE MY DREAM COME TRUEI WANT TO THANK YOU AND WILL DO SO THE REST OF YOUR LIFEYOU HAVE SHOWN ME WHAT PURE LOVE TRULY IS

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MY LIFE USE TO BE A WHIRLWIND OF CHAOS. THEN I MET YOU. MY LIFE USE TO HAVE NO DIRECTION BECAUSE IT WENT IN EVERY DIRECTION. THEN I MET YOU.I USE TO NEVER BE QUITE SURE WHY I WOKE UP EACH DAY. THEN I MET YOU.YOU BROUGHT MY LIFE SANITY. THEN ONE DAY I REGRETTED MEETING YOU.YOUR HANDS BRING HURT AND BRUISES.YOUR WORDS DESTROY MY HEART AND ERASE MY LOVE.I ALWAYS WISH NOW THAT I WOULD NOT WAKE UP TO YOU.YOU BROUGHT INSANITY AND CHAOS BACK INTO MY LIFE. TODAY I CHOOSE TO NOT LET YOU ANYMORE. TODAY I CHOOSE WHICH DIRECTION I GO NOT YOU.TODAY MY WORDS ARE FOUNDATION. YOU WILL BREAK ME NO MORE.TODAY I WILL MAKE SENSE OF MY WORLD AND LOCK YOU OUT IN THE COLD.THIS MOMENT I FOUND OUT I AM HAVING YOUR DAUGHTER. YOUR ONE AND ONLY BABY-GIRL. TODAY I CHOOSE TO NOT ONLY BE HER PROTECTOR,BUT HER MOTHER AS WELL. TODAY I WILL TRULY GIVE HER A BREATH OF LIFEAND YOU WILL TAKE OURS NO MORE.

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it was your job to protect me. you failed. you let them hurt me and touch me. you picked them over me and my innocence. you let me fall into my darkness and and my soul died. it was your job to protect me and keep me safe, but instead you honor those whose hands choke and kill. you walk with pride and call yourself my DADDY. Did you ever stop to think why i hate that word so much? if only you knew how many times they made me say that to them.

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