(This isn't a poem or a story or a quote. It's just some feelings)Months before we met I really didn't believe in love anymore. Seemed like every relationship around me was falling apart, so I thought to myself why do I want this to happen to me again?For a long time I was closed off from Men, I was only looking for fun. Some days I enjoyed the single life, others, I felt alone.We began to talk and to be honest I was scared and blew you off. So it took us sometime to actually meet.When we finally did I was blown away! All my walls came down straight away. I forgot about all those bad relationships and thought, doesn't mean it has to happen to me all the time, this could be the last time.You were smart, funny, charming and kind and best of all you didn't try to make a move (as much as I wanted you too (-: )We spent a good day together and I didn't want it to end.I truly like you and want to see where this goes, cos something tells me this could be the last time.
Earlier this year my best friend (who was also my first high school boyfriend) told me he has feelings for me. One of my other friends liked him and kind of pushed us together. Anyway we were in a relationship for about 2 weeks when he dumped me cos he had to leave the state to work. That was months ago and I just can't get over it! For a while he wouldn't even talk to me. I guess when he left I was a bit selfish and was angry cos I thought he was leaving cos he had commitment issues and didn't want to be with me.We talk now every now and then, we are trying to be friends again but I still love him way more than a friend. He wont tell me how he feels, we talk like friends but as soon as I bring up what happened he stops texting back.What does this mean? I would appreciate comments from guys.Keeping in mine months and months ago he told me he couldn't offer me a relationship so I was happy just being friends and I never thought about beingwith him,then all of a sudden he's telling my other friends if he had a chance with me he wouldn't screw it up, and he told me he use to get jealous when I would tell him about guys I was seeing. Then all of a sudden he wanted me, I didn't see it coming but he left just as quickly.
"Better That We Break"I never knew perfection tilI heard you speak, and now it kills meJust to hear you say the simple thingsNow waking up is hard to doAnd sleeping is impossible tooEverything is reminding me of youWhat can I do?It’s not right, not OKSay the words that you sayMaybe we’re better off this way?I’m not fine, I’m in painIt’s harder everydayMaybe we’re better off this way?It’s better that we break…A fool to let you slip awayI chase you just to hear you sayYou’re scared and that you think that I’m insaneThe city look so nice from herePity I can’t see it clearlyWhile you’re standing there, it disappearsIt disappearsIt’s not right, not OKSay the word it should sayMaybe we’re better off this way?I’m not fine, I’m in painIt’s harder everydayMaybe we’re better off this way?It’s better that we breakSaw you sitting all aloneYou’re fragile and you’re cold, but that’s all rightLife these days is getting roughThey’ve knocked you down and beat you upBut it’s just a rollercoaster anyway, yeahIt’s not right, not OKSay the words that you sayMaybe we’re better off this way?I’m not fine, I’m in painIt’s harder everydayMaybe we’re better off this way?I’m not fine, not OKSay the words that you sayMaybe we’re better off this way?I’m not fine, I’m in painIt’s harder everydayMaybe we’re better off this way?It’s better that we break, baby
It's almost like you had it planned It's like you smiled and shook my hand and said "Hey, I'm about to screw you over, big time" And what was I supposed to do? I was stuck in between you and a hard place We won't talk about the hard place But I don't blame you anymore That's too much pain to store It left me half dead Inside my head And boy, looking back I see I'm not the girl I used to be When I lost my mind It saved my life It's how you wanted it to be It's like you played a joke on me And I lost a friend In the end And I think that I cried for days But now that seems light years away And I'm never going back To who I was Cause I don't blame you anymore That's too much pain to store It left me half dead Inside my head And boy, looking back I see I'm not the girl I used to be When I lost my mind It saved my life I think that I cried for days But now that seems light years away And I'm never going back To who I was Cause I don't blame you anymore That's too much pain to store It left me half dead Inside my head And boy, looking back I see I'm not the girl I used to be When I lost my mind It saved my life That life seems like light years away Light years away And that life seems like light years away Light years away
I don't mind itI don't mind at allIt's like you're the swing setAnd I'm the kid that fallsIt's like the way we fightThe times I've criedWe come to blowsAnd every nightThe passion's thereSo it's got to be rightRight?No I don't believe youWhen you say don't come around here no moreI won't remind youYou said we wouldn't be apartNo I don't believe youWhen you say you don't need me anymoreSo don't pretend toNot love me at allI don't mind itI still don't mind at allIt's like one of those bad dreamsWhen you can't wake upIt looks like you've given upYou've had enoughBut I want moreNo I won't stopBecause I just knowYou'll come aroundRight?No I don't believe youWhen you say don't come around here no moreI won't remind youYou said we wouldn't be apartNo I don't believe youWhen you say you don't need me anymoreSo don't pretend toNot love me at allJust don't stand there and watch me fallBecause I, because I still don't mind at allIt's like the way we fightThe times I've criedWe come to blowsAnd every nightThe passion's thereSo it's got to be right,Right?No I don't believe youWhen you say don't come around here no moreI won't remind youYou said we wouldn't be apartNo I don't believe youWhen you say you don't need me anymoreSo don't pretend toNot love me at allI don't believe you
I'm sorry I said those things that made us fall apart again. I never meant to hurt you or doubt yourself in any way.The times we spent together I will never forget, because I was happy. I never stopped wanting you and never wanted anyone else.I don't believe you want this to end, I guess I will just have to sit and wait. I know I shouldn't but I think we're meant to be.I don't care what people say or think. I know you never meant to hurt me.I love you and we all make mistakes, and I will do anything to make it all right again.
To forgive is one thingTo forget is impossibleWhen you lie and say you love someoneThen turn and walk away.
Why did you say you love me?When not long after you left?How was it love?Why did you just leave me?After all I tried to doI put up with what you saidcos I thought you could be the oneWhy did you do this to me?I can't give my heart to anotherAll I think about is youThough you hurt me too many timesWhy are you so hard to get over?It's been too longI should move onIt's killing me inside.
Moving on is hard to do...We still talk and we shouldn'tif it's only going to end again.Being friends is hardbecause I still feel for you.I have told you and you sometimes feel the same.Is it cos you feel alone,and just need a backup?Moving on is hard to doI just can't do it with you aroundI still want youI want that feeling to fade.So I can finally move onIf thats the way it's meant to be.
2 Weeks... It doesn't seem like a long timeLots of things can happen in 2 weeks.You can win the lotteryMeet someone newMake new friendsOr lose a loved one.2 Weeks... It doesn't seem like long at allBut in 2 weeks I fell in love and lost that love.2 Weeks... Can seem like a lifetimeWhen you feel like your life has fallen apart.In 2 weeks everything can change.
I have decided to get closure! I threw out his stuff that he left at my house (i was holding onto them with hope) but just suddenly decided to ditch them. I know i deserve a man not a boy!!!I sent him a text message telling him exactly what I think of him (maybe not everything) but it was enough. And I read on this website "how to deal with getting dumped" that i should start writing a list of things that weren't that great about him. Only got 3 things so far but apparently it will grow...wait just thought of a 4th one lol.=D
