grumpylover

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HI my name is jasmin
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So much pain I've put you through so much pain you've put me through the pain was just to great we lost control of what was real What was meant to be so I've lost you so I've lost myself a need to forgive is much greater then the need to forget but i shall forgive you i just don't know if you can bare to forgive me the need to say it in this poem needing to set my emotions free to let them fly high as the birds and yet i don't seem to have wings i do all this to try and live with myself but i cant i cant stand our reality it stings like a venomous poison of a black widow to mend with this is so hard yet bending it doesn't feel as bad help me deal with this i say but yet there's no reply the sorrow of my pain the sorrow of my foray towards you heart the needless nights of pain with your memories will i forever stay?

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The mere pain I feel It cuts so deep deep into my heart to have no clue no reason to why why i feel this pain no one has harmed me yet i feel so abused so used in this world this world full of hate the reason why i feel such pain? no i say no not the hate its something inside something more the illness that shoots through my brain my brain the problem solved to feel this pain go away go away i say but yet it shall the need of time of the future like tomorrow such a beautiful day it seems and yes it is the solution to my illness time only time it is where it solves itself.

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In my life

I feel sad, lonely

And I don’t like those feelings

I see my life.

I don’t like it.

People say “you’re weird.”

“Why do you feel that way?”

They don’t understand

They never will.

They’re not me!!

They’re not in me!!

They see me.

They hear me.

They don’t understand.

They never will.

I want to keep this sad, lonely world in me.

Not share it with the world!! 

 

 

 

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So many things about you,I want to understand.Your past, the pain, the scars, the hate you have deep inside, the need of drugging yourself to feel happy.The reason why you keep wanting them in your life, eventhough they bring so much pain.The way you can have so much love to give,but yet not be able to love yourself.To rather have yourself die, then see them get hurt.To be able to see him,then have him locked up.The reason why i cant seem to help you.To be able to stop you from hurting your body.I want to understand! To make you see how much your worth!To make you believe how beautiful you are.Why cant you not see how much I need you?How much I love you.The trust i lost.That I understand.The pain I put you through,the tears i made fall.Never again will I do that to you.I promise to never let you go.I love you baby girl.

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I miss you... everything about you... your laugh... your beauty... your smile... your eyes... your hug... your mood swings (hehhehhehe)... your touch... how it would bring chills down my spine... the way you kiss... oh how i miss your lips... the touch of your hand on mine... the way we made love... how i wish i can be right by your side... the way i use to take the blankets away from you at night... the way you would make me smile whenever I was feeling down... how you helped me through my pain... the way you make me crack up... how you pissed me off but then knew just the right words to say to make me cool down... the way you make me feel so happy... the things you said to me... they gave me hope... but i just simply miss YOU!!! all and everything about you... I love you... always and forever your *changa*

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Getting through this... its not going to be easy... feels like sometimes we're going to break apart... hake sometimes we do... me and you... seems impossible... your there I'm here... though the love we have stays strong... people try to break us apart... now that everyone knows... harder for us to be together... they make me believe things... things that hurt... but one thing is for sure... me and you... can get through this... forget about what anybody says... just think of us... and we'll get through this.. this i promise you