chulila

  • 1669
passionate about justice and enjoy the little things of life...but sometimes my other side get bored easily..drama ..ha.. ha promising to live life to the fullest even if it hurts. Wishing that when my time comes I used all my talents and have no regrets.
Relationships
Empty
chulila
 added a post 

I am so sweet when you are with me.
I spend time with you with whispers of love and sometimes we touch for hour with no words to be heard but only felt.
You come to me and we share our time away from the world.
We escape from reality and cheat our troubles for a moment.
I give you my all and you have me on my toes.
Still you want more like the others without giving an inch more of your self.
I give to you and your greed empty s me and you leave until the next time.
I am going to enjoy you and I cant say I will not feel for you because it is against my nature to  not love.
I have been hurt and abandoned but I will never give up on love.







chulila
 added a post 

Love has change its meaning.

Its definition has deepen and has more depth than ever to me.


Love has change its value to a higher price to pay and I do not know if I can afford it today.

chulila
 added a post 

I write to the Angles who love is pure.
I tell them thanks for sitting at my bed side on all those long dreary nights and all those days of despairs.
I thank them for sheltering me under their wings and for those whispers of love when no one was there.
I thank them for sending be strangers that gave me more than expected.
I write to them to say that their precsence was felt and wish I was able to hug them today. 
I thank them for protecting my children and giving them enough strength to take over the bills and housekeeping and over my self.
I thank the Angles for walking them to school and giving them company when I was not there but in a hospital bed when things were rough.
I understand they were scared and children still so young, but we pulled through with love and that all to it.
Here I stand in one piece and strong.

The path was hard.....
The path to get back up is even harder....
So I hope my Angle has not left I wonder because I am not a Fighter as many people think.

chulila
 added a post 

I have fought and struggle for strength and air.
I have prayed and hanged on to love memories of far away.

I have thought of kisses and hugs and smiles that once I owned and now are gone.
A fighter they call me of life and love.

Even if my tears are wasted and now none are left to pour...I have fought for my life and here I am again

with dreams of a companion that will stay with me to the end.

I Lost my friends and family went away....I lost my lover boy who was suppose to be in love with me.

I lost my career and almost my mind ....but Here I am again with dreams to love again.

I fought my enemy cancer and now it's gone forever,  the scars on my neck show proof of the struggle.

The scars in my heart are worse and cant be seen by others.

I fought and struggle for strength and air.
I have fought and prayed and won the game.
I haven't lost my dreams and the power to love....I just need a companion to stay with me to the end.


I have no rush and this second chance I will take care to do it right and love deeper then ever.

chulila
 added a post 

I am contempt with everything I have even-though I would not deny getting more can be a good thing if it is given to me.

Life has its up and downs and sometimes the road was bumpy and seem never to end.

Like has had its gray days and sunny skies but the storms have been frequent and wipe everything away.

Life has taught many lessons and have walk teh trail of tears...but ....

Laughs and joy has made the hard times unbearable in comparison.

Yes I am contempt with everything I have even-though I would not change a thing so far ...but I would love a break.

A break to be  given a lover who wants to cherish and share life with me....

A little love to make things more easy.

chulila
 added a post 

I read all the blogs I wrote during the torment of your love today.
I read all the pain and remember all the tears,
I read all the blogs to keep my mind clear.
To remember why I decided to pull you out of my life and start anew.
Even though we are not together our hope are fresh but my dreams are stale.
I read all those blogs of love and trail of tears of the last two years and a half of relationship down the drain.
Your lost not mines you did the harm and are still holding on to  a love that was so great from my side and not yours.
Your lost not mines you did the harm and I cried and died and picked myself up. My knees were scraped and my heart broken.
My eyes dim and my hair dull. My glow gone and my smile forgotten.
My sleep interrupted and my daily routine empty.
My children suffer of a lost so big they miss they  me and I can not help it.
I read all the blogs I wrote during the torment of your love today and all 191 were sad and so I know I am doing the right decision.
Good-bye my love
and to all a good life...

chulila
 added a post 

The more you judge someone
the less you love them....

The more you accept the persons flaws the deeper the love...

chulila
 added a post 

Hi -

Hello-

Whats your name ..how you doing?

Imma fine my name is.... what is yours?...

Day after day you meet people and they just want to play the game of " GUESS WHO i AM AND WHAT i WANT"
Day after day you meet people that mess up your day by creating lies that give false hope and illusions that shatter in moment..
seconds after you met.

Day after day I try not to give up....Its been six months my ex broke up with me and its been six months that he has bug me for a chance.

Day after day I meet potential people and my ex@#$% it up.
Today this blog I will remember because its written with a decision  in my heart of finally pulling out my ex out of my life for ever.
Today I have finally decide to start anew and give another a chance.
Today I dream but standing in reality with a man that wants me.
Today this blog which is simple holds more power than all I have written ...because it has been
written with a decision in heart of forgetting my soul mate and walking away.

Adios dios de bendiga...Te quiero siempre que te vaya bien...payaso negro mio  august 2010

chulila
 added a post 

The sun went down and I died a million times.

The sun is gone and the night is endless with my cries that carries up into the air towards the full moon.

The darkness invokes my soul into a fog or mist of fatigue in depressed moods.

I throw a fistful of tears in the air and showers my head as I choke  with it.

Your love is hopeless at last it lies in the womb of another  and grows every minute into a baby that will eventually be part of you and her.

She had been in your life for only six weeks and i have been here for two years and it counts for nothing....yes you are crying for me ....

but when the infant comes it will erase all memories and you will be happy my love and so I depart now fast and swift....

unnoticed by everyone no traces of me....to leave you live your life and be happy while I shout and tear and die and shatter inot a million pieces ...

I fought my cancer and won I have a second chance to life...

But I lost all my friends and family and you ..and you......

How little all of you love that in such a short time you lost all hope in me...I was forgotten even before I left this world.

I love to the fullest....and my love for all is what kept me going...thank you  for the time and thanks for your superficial love it got me through.

I will live again everything new...it just has to come slowly again. My mind and body is strong like an Ox but my spirit is broken and needs healin ...lets see how it goes. Thank You all ....now on with my new life.

chulila
 added a post 

When the sun goes down and colors paint the skies of magical dreams I dream with you.

When the moon comes out and shines my heart I keep loving you.

When the breeze hits my face under the  sleeping trees I look up to the dark starry night and feel you.

When I hear footsteps on the cement floor I dare not dream because I know its not you.

While I sip my coffee at midnight on my porch in this silent night I miss you.

As I walk into my house and retreat to my bedroom I say good bye to memories that fill my heart.

I know I will not dream with you because I have learn to live without you this long so far.

I close my eyes and block you out of reality and illusions and dreams.

chulila
 added a post 

When the sun goes down and colors paint the skies of magical dreams I dream with you.

When the moon comes out and shines my heart I keep loving you.

When the breeze hits my face under the  sleeping trees I look up to the dark starry night and feel you.

When I hear footsteps on the cement floor I dare not dream because I know its not you.

While I sip my coffee at midnight on my porch in this silent night I miss you.

As I walk into my house and retreat to my bedroom I say good bye to memories that fill my heart.

I know I will not dream with you because I have learn to live without you this long so far.

I close my eyes and block you out of reality and illusions and dreams.

chulila
 added a post 
I cried for help and no one was there. I ask for help and no one rescue me. I prayed and my prayers were heard but you never came.

Info
Full Name:
chulila
Friends count:
Followers count:
Membership
Administrator
My Posts