Raconteur



"I know when I am out of touch and time just feels so 'write', that I've become poetically a dream that's taken flight"
Relationships
Empty
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Smooth 





As the listening night
Fondles a breeze
Along a curious sky,
And I continue to fall away

Tapered fingers touch
Upon a half-smile
And downward look
For the undertakings
Of your gentler nature

Smoothing my mind
Across innocent thought
I sit motionless
Amidst the realms
Of wonderment

Until the sweet desolation
In the absence of your voice
Begins weeping our tale,

And the stillness
Stings any movement
Fading from my deserted eyes




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Moon Bird

 

 

 

 

I dreamt I was a little bird

That taught myself to fly

My first attempt I hit the ground

But I refused to cry

 

I shook it off and flapped my wings

Until I got it right

With nothing left to hold me back

I flew into the night

 

I realized that gravity

Could not hold on to me

And so I flew towards the moon

Since Earth had set me free

 

It took a while to reach the moon

It's pretty far from here

And from the moon I saw the Earth

So beautiful and clear

 

I told the moon about my dreams

That I had left at home

And that it was the only place

Where my true heart could roam

 

‘You better go before you wake’

Came as the moon's reply

‘And little bird, remember this-

You taught yourself to fly’

 

When I awoke I smiled at you

Then whispered in your ear,

‘You should fly to the moon

It's not that far from here’

 

 

 

 

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Agile Enlightenment



Having found the fuming hatred
And pretentious enlightenments
Of the collapsing world
Behind the boredom of fatigue
Disheartening


I began to question the nature
Of such dedicated efforts
Constantly moving us along
The faltering weight
Of existence

Trailing the agility
Of wilting time
Along the gentle steps of night,


I knowingly
Traced the inexpressible
Lasting impressions
Radiating of a beauty
Unknown


And as I did, my charming,
Albeit brief encounter
With this nameless grace
Sparked an imaginative smile
Upon my expectant face

Thus releasing
The mellifluous
Splendor of her
Ancient Laughter


Which surprisingly enough 
Had pretentiously 
Escaped my own
Conceptual oppressions


Of preconceived notions 


 

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Exasperating Vim 




Speak for me my Raconteur
Convey a reverie
Shift affluent fauna
To a flora bourgeoisie

Mesmerize insanity
Or scream my solitude
That's perished from anxiety's
Rebirth of gratitude

Sanctify theology's
Impartial parity
Expounding how irrelevance
Detracts veracity

And reify my energy
Delighting what was dim
To tarnish sociability's
Exasperating vim
 

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Sifted Grain 




Sifting through forgotten dreams
To find my peace of mind 
'Tho abstracting foggy shores
Detracts what I should find

Waves of misted solitude
Have crashed without a break
Leaving my uncertainty
Uncovered in their wake

Heated swells have buried me
Inside a fevered shell
Now my verve can't sense beyond
Just knowing I'm not well

Sleeping through the worst of it
Deterred most of the pain
Until it showed my fated sands
How they were but a grain
 

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Episodic Isolation

 

 

 

 

As the fragmented memories chasing

The warmth from color-filled days

Take hold of the shattered efforts,

 

I discover how liaising a recalcitrant society

Can calmly reject the implorations

Of an anxious soul seeking nothing more

Than a cleansing rest from its exhausted misery

 

Though barely able to stand firm

Within my indifference while watching

The unimaginable fall carelessly through

The disguise of tact and familiar horror,

 

I find myself still sitting far beyond

The desperate reaches of my

Sincerity's scattered bitterness

 

Scarcely able now to hear forever

Screaming along my jagged tears

Cutting gingerly away at the vague traces

Of trust rumored to be found

Within the hardened depths

Of my pallor face

 

Without a wink, or a smile

 

I remain reluctant to acknowledge

Confessions exonerating the delicate pieces

Of what little love had been handed out to me

Through the knowing joys

Of my once shining adolescence

And incredulous happiness

That painted me in two.

 

And though I claim to have lost

My refuge inside my mosaic memories

(Blaming of course false pride for withholding in vain)

 

I find myself, oddly enough,

Planted outside my inner-melancholy

With a sudden need to grow a fondness

For the seeds I have discovered of late

Flourishing within my reasoning.

 

Purposely, I begin cradling them

With intent and deliberation

Somewhere far and in-between

The sacred and the silence

 

Before meticulously placing

Them along the decipherable charms

Of my nearly unrecognizable injured wall

Still standing defiantly after having inhaled

The ashes of frigidness

Suffocating my episodic beauty

Of isolation

 

Thus revealing to every inch of my flesh

I not only failed to breathe a better us,

I neglected to wake the amazing dream

Of his love's touch as well.

 

Even still, he cannot deny

His irresistible desire

To let his feathery fingertips

 

Be felt playing across my back

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The Innocent 






Nina failed to make it home when darkness came around
And everyone went looking for her but she wasn't found
A week had passed before they got to see Nina again
And everyone was shocked how she had grown so pale and thin 


Nina couldn't tell them she was pulled inside a car
By a man who burned her many times with a cigar
And when they found out that she wasn't innocent and pure
Nina's father vowed that he would kill this man for sure 


Weeks had passed without a word or hint of Nina's smile
Doctor's said she'd talk again but it could take a while
She would curl up in a ball and suck her little thumb 
While staring blankly into space oblivious and numb 


What had happened to their child they really didn't know
But they hoped that someday soon her mind would let it go
It took a while but when she finally found her voice again
Nina's father truly thought her screaming wouldn't end 


They were driving to the store when all of this took place
And her dad could tell of something wrong just from her face
'Daddy look' she said at last 'there's that hurtful man'
And he followed for his mind already had a plan 


'The bastard's going to finally pay for all the hurt he's done'
Were the words he said to her while reaching for his gun
Then this man he'd vowed to kill pulled up into his drive
And when Nina's father left this man was not alive 


He drove awhile then said to her that now she'd be okay
But soon found out that wasn't true because he heard her say
'Daddy there's that hurtful man now he's over here'
And Nina said this every time she saw a man appear 



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Grand 



The best of times we didn't make
Along with smiles I had to fake
Are all that I can take of you
The rest just give to you know who

My clothes it seems she's made to fit
You know she wears them to forget
A piece of shit dressed up like me
Still far excedes all she will be

She'll love my life; it's fucking great
Especially your fists of hate
Just so you know, your stupid whore
Had nearly made it out the door

But chose to laugh instead of run
And even thought that I was fun
Like I'm the one who bought her drinks
Or cares what stupid thoughts she thinks

But stealing rights or selling wrongs
Has kicked your heart where it belongs
Between the lines of my disdain
Where dreamers rhyme their angry pain 

From broken strings tuned out of tears 
To strident songs that no one hears 
Composed of notes that scorn the past 
And childish dreams I couldn't last 

But keys now turn to play behind 
And lock out my discordant mind 
So heart I lack the skill to play 
Keeps perfect time with yesterday 




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Density




Along the cobwebs
Of residual dreams
Lost in the corners
Of my mind

Adheres the beauty
Of verdant love
Shifting through
Chromatic splendor
Delicately brushed
With the grace of
Watered silk

Once soothed upon
My tired brow
As inspiration's
Caressing touch

It now enslaves me
To the endlessness
Of lonely searches

Through the broken colors
Still seen screaming apart
Between each blink
Of my tired eyes

Seeking the kinder eyes
And musing smiles
Once offering provisions
From the reservoir of dreams
For my troubled cares
To drink in the comfort
Of sleep within rest

For contentment's cruel touch
Of warmth and laughter
Though but a breath

Has left its
Perpetual sorrow
Aching
For my forever
Homesick

And as the haunting
Of my restless mind
Grows intensity  
For the temporal
Darkness of
Immensity

Remorse arises
And beauty sets 
Turning dim with
The forever shade

In vain...

I call upon 
The weary dawn 

Still 

Yet never gone...

...And wait 

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Negated Sanctuary 




After the untenable
Speculation disillusioning
Our favored universe

That displaced me
Outside the only breath
I was still able to endure

Had passed me along
To the darkened edges
Of a tortured night

I found myself easily lost
Amidst the faltering shade
Of love's nostalgic pines

Though seemingly content
Now to blacking out as a
Faded remnant of beauty
Thought falling within the
Careless perception of my tears

I was no longer capable
Of feeling past nor obtaining
The pretentious stabilities found
Within familiarity or warmth

Thus mistaking the 
Compunction 
In a knowing glimpse 
Of my sorrowful refuge 
Reluctantly searching me
Somewhere in-between
Yesterday's touch
And today's aloof distance

For the eminent hand
Belonging to my
Stranger of late

Whose only validity
Of consequence was
In rendering me
A weeping vision 

To be
Unremittingly
Haunted 

By forever's
Vacant song
Of lamentation


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Partisanship

 

 

 

Yesterday,

I was a lost dreamer

Found only

With a questionable subjectivity

And an eviction notice

 

Among other things

 

Today,

I am ghost;

Existentially vague

Finding contentment in haunting

The passing world of the imagination

 

Amongst other things

 

Tomorrow,

I'll be a probability

And ponder through

Resentful eyes

At the passing of

Wonderment

In

Bewilderment

 

Along with other things

 

But always,

Never, and forever,

I'll be an abstraction

Of awareness

In keeping

A metaphoric inquiry

 

Apart from all things

 

 

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Regress

 

 


Phantom shrouds of dreary old

Imposed on ancient smiles

Beckon placid somber night

In folds of nestled grace

 

Reified intemperance

Sulked spotless of remorse

Reconcile love's virulence

Symbolic, shallow calm

 

Denigrating loyalty's

Relinquishment of trust

Cry dense thy sorrowed avalanche

Embittered by design

 

Dwindle passion's envied sigh

Drown silent languor deep

 

Heed to furtive tear-drop flow 
Scream distant thoughts to speak

 

Pallor fade from gentle eyes

Fall restful memory
Merely dust upon my pride

Love's sickened reverie

 


~My Exile of Repose~





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Raconteur
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