Questions, Nestled in a box of love.

I sit, gazing out my darkened bedroom window
my eyes downcast, my heart, ablaze with sorrow
For in my heart lies a secret, a truth that you don't know
A secret, a truth, of which I do not dare let you know

You've gone far away, that much is true
But I do not know, why this this heart is still pining for you
For six months, they have come and they have gone
But still I sit on my prayer mat every night, asking, What did I do wrong?

What do I lack, in this soul of mine,
that you've gone far, far away, and don't even seem to acknowledge that love that we once had,
not even once?

O Keeper of a huge piece of my heart, I ask of you,
Will I ever, ever get over you?

But...
How do I get over you, when He always places you in my path?
How do I get over you, when our two worlds, somehow, always seem to collide?
How do I get over you, when it seems like He does not allow me to?

& by His grace He has shed much of His shining light on me,
& with His will He has shown so much of His plans of my life to me,
& He has allowed me to see things, that baffle me, leave me aghast
at how low a level a person can stoop down to, really, but they forget that in the end,
the only thing they'll be holding on to is their own evil dust.

O Keeper of a huge piece of my heart, I ask of you,
Keep the doors your heart open, don't seal them shut,
For if they're closed you will not receive the wisdom of His light

I pray that you see the truth for what it really is;
don't ruin your life for something that you thought could go back to what it once was.

Change is the key to this life, so please embrace it
Don't push it away just cos you have a deep fear of it
For He will be there to guide you every step of the way,
just like how He's been there for you, every single day.

So I pen this poem for you, my secret love,
'cos I cherish the love that we once shared,
& never do I want you away from Him & His love.

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