drew Hoppe

There's a moment

A feeling

A falling

A breaking in my mind

I've looked and looked

Wandered and wondered

And I can not find

They say there's a light

But I'm losing this fight

Not sure I ever had it

A thousand lifetimes

I've imagined

And not one

Is etched in stone

You think I care whether you see?

I couldn't give a rats ass what you think of me

I come here because it has been my place

Long before I ever saw your face

I wouldn't marry her

To spite you, or out of hate for you

If you must know it ain't got shit to do with you

I've finally figured out

I'm much better without

If you must know?

Its because I'm happy in ways I never imagined

And at peace with me and all I have and ever will be

I go to work, and sometimes I hate it

But I do it for her

No its not always flashy

Romeo and Juliet

Dumb shit

Like how I was at 18

But I've come to realize

That was a lie

From the moment I met your eyes

#idgafra

There's a ring in my pocket

A thought on my mind

All the barriers I could find

Long tumbled and over grown

I guess all there is now

Is to ask it

#love

I walked about my second home

A town I had come to know

With friends and laughter

And echo's of yesteryear

I didn't shed a single tear

Here and there were memories

Ghosts only I could see

Its been too long

Its way too far gone

Things I can never have again

I know why, I know how

I know, I know, I know

Years later, I'm still bitter and angry

Confused and sad

I know its all in my head

For all it matters it might as well have been a figment of imagination

And even as I know that's not true

That it was the most important time of my life

All it is now...

Is ghosts in my head

#life

I used to be so alive inside

But in the army something died

I don't know what, I don't know how

But I'll relight that fire

Even if it kills me

Cause losing you was close enough to death

But losing me was something worse

#life

It is all i do

I work

For money

for things

For me

And that ghost in my head

That is you

Long gone and shattered dreams

I work to heal

To fix

Not us....

But me

A healthy weight

A shiny smile

A mind that is whole

Oh I'm a mess now

But I won't always be

For once...

Not for you

For me

To a smoke free, worry free me. A healthier more confident version of myself, the me I should always have been

#none

You were the girl who would do anything for me, the only thing you couldn't do is make me, love me.

#idk?

It's a feeling of happiness

That used to fill me up

But now I feel a building rage

Like incompetence follows me

Your intriguing questions heard once

And a million more

Are now nothing but an annoying bore

And the boredom made worse

By the feeling that if I were to leave

In search of happiness

You would blow away

In the wind so insubstantial

When the going gets tough

The tough get going

But you...

Just fall apart

There seems to be a lacking

A sucking void

Where human strength of character

And inspiration lay

But I am not some master

And so I can not drive you to that conclusion

I did not know

That humans could become shadow

So insubstantial

And yet I stay

Someone has to hold you up

#ughh

Can I scream screams

That never were dreamed

While the deaf whisper

Unheard parables

Terrible secrets

That everyone knows

Even as they deny

In the dark the light will die

But with a fight

And whisper one more lie

#ugh

I've looked upon the sky

So endless

And pondered if your looking too

Remembering a day

We looked together

And the sun it burnt us

While we laughed

#memories

What words can

And need to be said

To fill the empty parts

Inside your head

What actions may

Heal long broken hearts

And mend souls rend

Of questions unasked

And unanswered

#idk