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nothing much to say what i write will say it all, you may not understand it but its how i feel and can best describe my feelings.
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Empty, numb cold all  alone

No one to talk to, not even on the phone

Time passes, feelings never fade

Emptiness grows, leaving life in the shade.

 

I'm numb im life less, im cold and weak

So much so, it hurts to speak

I'm afraid to trust, not allowed to live

Locked up in my home with nothing to give.

 

It's not your fault, I abused your trust

Let you down, fucked you over but by needs must.

I cant make this right, the damage is done.

But I miss you dearly my second mum

 

Stuck in the middle, you had to choose

I know that now, I was bound to loose

But fighting so much, against a few

Has left me weak and needing you.

 

I guess what I mean, or want to say

Is I miss you dearly in every way. 

I don't expect change, I just needed you to know. 

I love you .. . 

 

I'm so  sorry. . . I never meant to hurt you.

Xx 

 

 

lonely and afraid sat alone, confused and empty my cold heart beats,but for what i dont know questions unanswered memories that fade. i dont want to remember any more everyone sees the same face no one bothers to delve deeper for if they do, it scares them what they find a hurt lost little girl no direction no love just emptiness and a wanting to belong how can i love ? i dont know how.... these barriers and memories push people away to protect me from any more pain. i get close to some one then wham automatic pilot kicks in and im alone yet again this isnt me! robbed from my life i now live in fear no love , no joy just bitterness and tears take it away im had my fair share i want to live i want to be me again!
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