I stare into his dark eyes and see nothing
I knew a time once when it shone with love
a long time ago...

too long ago..

he pounds without remorse
fist on flesh
blood on fist

My body is frozen
made immobile by his touch
I try to speak, but cannot find the words

try to scream,
but my throat is caught

I open my mouth
to cry out
but instead of words
a torrent of red bursts forth

I close my eyes 
and welcome the void
the numbness is like ecstacy
from afar I can hear voices
unclear, but I know their there

at last, I open my eyes

Im surrounded by a world of white
angels float by me as if in slow motion
such beauty - gliding all alight

I smile at them but they don't seem to notice
I call out  softly but they don't hear
I try to sit up, but cannot
I look down and scream
except there's no sound

when I awoke
I saw him
he sat against the wall
shoulders heaving
body shaking
he was crying

I've never seen him cry before

I tryed to move to him
but the slightest move
made my body cane in agony

I called his name
he looked up
stared me in the eye
and for a moment I saw him
the man I fell in love with
I held his gaze
the moment passed

he grabbed my hand
and whispered something
I couldn't quite catch what he said
i looked down at my hand
I tried not to focus on the pool of blood around me
there was a note
it said ' I love you'

I smiled up at him
he hadn't said that in a long time
'I love you too' i said

I don't know how long I smiled for
or when the police came and took him away
I can't remember when I stopped breathing
or how many wounds he made
but I do remember his note

And throughout all the pain
I remember the love we shared
I don't know why he did what he did
but I do know I loved him
however stupid it may seem

I made a vow

& even death can't deny me that.

Written & (c) by Roselia