A single woman's Bedtime Prayer (as told by a friend of mine, she is single and looking)

Now I lay me down to sleep,

I pray for a man who's not a creep.

One who's handsome, smart and strong.

Who's not afraid to admit when he is wrong

One who thinks before he speaks.

When he promises to call, he doesn't wait six weeks.

I pray that he is gainfully employed,

Won't lose his cool when he's annoyed.

Pulls out my chair and opens my door,

Massages my back and begs to do more.

Oh send me a man who will make love to my mind.

Know what to say when I ask "How fat is my ass?"

One who'll make love till my body's a' itchin'

He brings ME a sandwich too, when he goes to the kitchen.

I pray that this man will love me to no end,

And never compare me to my best friend.

Thank you in advance and now I'll just wait,

For I know you will send him before it's too late.

Amen