we started this relationship since we were in hih school.. at first, everything seems to be perfect... we used to be together at school, after school... we used to have our lunch together.. we had some stories in our classes.. looks like we're best of friends... nothing can asks for...

a year ago... suddenly something changed.. the way he treated me... before, he used to text me just to inform that he's with his friends doing some stuffs for their school.. there are times that there's a doubt within me.. what is this happening to us.. it seems that the love that we had before slowly fading.. i used to doubt him many times... but i'm fighting for that doubts and says to myself.. i should've trusted my boyfriend... (but the girl's instinct is right.. isn't it?) coz i found out... =( he was seeing other girl.. i cried a lot that time.. and i was just askin myself... why this things happened to me when all i want is to love and be loved... =(

one time when i'm in the hospital because my cousin confined for some reason... i waited for my boyfriend's text coz he just went to their retreat.. i didn't receive any reply from him.. he arrived in the hospital about an hour and i didn't asks him lots of question coz i know he just finished his retreat.. i just asked him... i haven't recieved any reply from you... he says.. i replied once coz i fell asleep in the bus... i borrowed his cellphone coz i need to text my sister.. but i was shocked... i read his sent items.. he texted this girl... "hi hon.. i was about to go home right now, i miss you".... i dnt know how should i react that time.. we used to call hon.. but the thing is.. i didn't receive any message from him that says that.. in short, it's not for me...  =( i felt like my heart scattered into pieces.. i want to cry that time.. but still trying to be strong.. and he admitted... that he was seeing another girl and he said sorry for that and he will not do that again... HOW STUPID I AM TO SAY.. IT'S OKAY... it's because i love him... more than my life... i thought he'll never do that to me again.. but i'm wrong.. he did it many times.. =( 

 
why this things should happen to me that all i want is to love and to be loved.. =( it's really hard to move on into something that u think it will last forever.. =( i thought he's the man that i've been waiting for in my life.. and now.. in just one snap.. everything fades away...