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moh_jarrad's blog

 

Your Eyes Won't Let My Thoughts Go Back to Sleep

Your eyes won't let my thoughts go back to sleep.
Your words draw me across 2000 miles.
I don't know you at all, and yet I know
You better than my friends of many years.

The days I spent with you are like a tape
I play, rewind, play, rewind, and play.
Whenever I remember something new,
I feel as though you touched me on the cheek.

I miss you as the grass awaits the wind,
Or as the morning sky awaits the sun.
Although I look for you in every doorway,
I find only the darkness in my heart.

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Comments

Raconteur
Raconteur
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I cannot, by any means, shrug off the sentimental side of this piece, but, trust me, this is fookin' well written.

It read like a blown feather.

Aye, fer sure I hold in account that as I read and am reviewing Fur Elise is noted through me headphones, but after consideration agree with meself that it's not Beethoven's magic contending here, it's yer words and poetic grace.

Nature and feeling-driven building of human characters blend perfectly to deliver something I call Poetry with a loud rattling baritone.

I wouldn't go too far, it's simple, but the efficacy factor is the most robust of 'Fairies have tails;'traits. Fer a metaphoric happy ever after.
Description, outlining weaving of words.

Aplomb.

Now, yer sentiments fer yer hearts focus have made me smile, aye, so indeed that ups the ante, and gives it unique vibes--from the inner mind to sheer third-person eulogy, to remember.

Then it turns around and gets to be introspective and candid at the same time.

I think I'm kind of fond to such a hat trick.

Fer sure it's that kind of poetry which finds a refuge in Poetry itself, a solace a few can afford to enjoy (are there just a few pencils left in this huge-arse world? I've got three in my closet. One in my pocket...Yeah, the extinction of led-by-leads pencils never felt this close!).

Anyway, bottom line...

Yer verse was a sweet little poetic find, yer see I read about 100 poems a day, and only feel the "Wow" factor in about 2, enough fer me to comment on.

Be well Poet, yer gots it.

'Anna
 
BAND_FREAK_2010
BAND_FREAK_2010
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WOW THIS IS AMAZING
 


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