 | If you knew where the rope that kept you bounded was located, would you cut it? Would you have the strength to sever yourself from the blood pounding, breath racing, mind numbing ardor? Or would you continue nurturing it and be surprised at the ever increasing intensity? Because when we came together again, it was as if we never parted. Instead, everything became magnified. Everything became frantic. Whispers of ‘more’ echoed in our minds. Where we were once elusive, we tempted fate by kissing and holding in peopled places. It was the ardent kisses that melted my doubts. It was his patience and attention that dissolved my fight. He called me the most gorgeous girl he’s ever seen. I wished I believed him. But it did not matter, because he made me feel the way he saw me. When we did finally come together that beginning of October, it was as fiery and fulfilling as all our caresses and whispers alluded to. There is no turning back.
“I will have to try very hard not to fall for you,” I mumble in my half intoxicated sleepy state. We had celebrated his 24th birthday by my having a margarita larger than his.
“I’m not trying hard enough,” he whispers back but I pretend I don’t hear him and we never mentioned what was said that night. He was going home for a month and half. We tried to spend as much time together as we could. But suspicions were abound as some people noticed we were together more. He joked we were together when I adamantly denied. After all, we were not together, nothing was ever said. He asked why I cared about what they thought. And my excuse was I liked privacy and there would be too many questions that we ourselves did not have the answer to. For is it not true we have not once discussed what the status of our relationship was? We have cocooned ourselves because of our earlier statements of we were both not ready for anything serious. Did that mean I meant nothing? But the way he looked at me, the way he held me, the emotion I can see in his eyes after our kisses told me otherwise. I needed to hear it from him, for I did not want to broach the subject again and appear weak. |  |
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