 | As to the reasons I’m consumed with all this Pain
Is reasons as to what is literally driving me insane
Is it so true that this hollow senseless void used to be considered my heart?
Why can’t I find the strength inside of myself to take and make this pain depart?
Have I become so dependent on another that I am too weak to stand on my own?
Can’t I rid this pain that surrounds me, consumes me, keeping me broken & alone?
GOD have I become such a pitiful wasting pile of puke that this is now my place?
Does it even really matter that this soul is dying and never a smile found on its face?
Am I just feeling sorry for the degenerated waste of life that I have now become?
Some say that I am this and I am that, but what I see in me is not as seen by some.
I see a life that could’ve should’ve would’ve…but DIDN’T AT ALL…
No matter how big, how bad, how great, no really I feel like a failure, quite small.
The taking of everything that ever really mattered to me in this life I once cherished..
Has been ripped away, stolen, broken, lied to and my Love I once had has perished.
WHY CAN”T I SHAKE THIS F***NG PAIN!!!????
WHY IS THIS DRIVING ME F***NG INSANE????!!!!!
I love my kids but it doesn’t seem to heal this no it doesn’t seem to be enough!!!
How did I become so weak, where did I go wrong, why am I not that tough??
Each day that slips by me seems to pull me deeper down into this HELL!!!
Its getting the best of my everything its directing my calamity I just want to YELL!!
The reasons to wake and face another day…
Are quickly leaving me, yes going away.
My children are gone my own blood and flesh
This F***D UP, SINGLE, DIVORCED BULL**T WITH ME DOESN’T MESH!!!
I’m a fool for not listening to those that knew me best…
I pushed them away just like I did all the rest.
Now I sit alone in this life known also as my personal Hell….
Its dark and quite and carries a death like smell.
My hair is gray, my teeth are rotting out of my head…
I wish it was just all over, I often believe all would be happier if I was just dead.
Written by free4thinkin
Submitted by free4thinkin |  |
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