 | I met my Ex boyfriend Jeff about year ago!.. I walked into this random party and there he was! He looked at me and I Looked at him! I knew there was something there! The whole night we hung out talking about everything.We even went to this other party and told everyone we were together for 2 years. It was amazing, people kept telling us how happy we looked! Even though werent together, I was happy!. After that night he gave me his number and I gave him mine, He called me that night! It was awesome not only did he call me so early we talked the whole night! Untill the sun came up! We did that everynight for about 3 weeks.! At the time he had a girlfriend, he did when we first met, after those three weeks even after the first day we really started to like eachother!!! I even felt in love!!! He broke up with his girlfriend and We got together! It was amazing the first 3 months we were always together, After school he would be by my house to pick me up or just pick me up at school! We knew everything about eachother! I even called him my Babybear, and I was his Beautiful Babygirl..I felt so comfortable around him, I didnt feel like I needed anyone but him.. We went through so much sh*t, But always were there for eachother, He even had a little drug problem, He stoped, I helped him.. After being with eachother everyday for those 3 months we started to get in little arguements nothing big but then tore me apart, one night he went to this party and I wasnt invited, that was the night we were argueing. The next day we made up and nothing seemed wrong! Everything seems back to normal! That night I hung out with this girl who was at the party with him, she told me that her best friend and him had sex!! I was devistated!! I didn't know what to do, The man I loved so much cheated on me. I felt like I was nothing! That night, after crying the whole day I got enought nerve to confront him! He admitted to it, he said he was drunk and that he still knew what he was doing and that it was the worst mistake in his life! At first I was like no.. Where done, thats it! I didn't want that to happend I figured she was just some dumb hoe he took him pain out on! I didnt want to end it! He wouldnt give up, all his friends were telling me how much I ment to him. I talked to his best friend Kely she told me that he told her that he did it! He was crying, and Told her he didnt want to tell me because he didn't want to loose me. That got 2 me! I took him back! Things were kinda shady for about a week after that, I was scared I didnt want him to hurt me agian! He had apologized to me over and over and next stoped telling me how much he loved me, and how she ment nothing to him! I believe him, I was so in love with him by this time I didnt care. After that we broke up often, but It was never anything serious. We both knew we couldnt be apart! We would break up and get back together in less than a week. One night I went to a party, And I ended up kissing this kid, me and Jeff werent together but at the same time we were kinda, cuz we always got back together! All I did was kiss him, I didn't mention to tell Jeff. I didn't want to get in anymore problems. We then got back together and we were happy! By this time we were probley been together for about 5 months. Even though we fought alot we were still happy, I loved him and he loved me! We ever talked about having a family, getting married, and being together forever! One night we got into this huge arguement! He went to his freinds, that kid I had kissed before was there and told him that we had kissed, Jeff freaked! He went off and cheated with me on that girl that told me that he did before, she gave him head!! It was crazy I was so torn apart by all of this! I thought we were never going to be togheter! I was always getting hurt by him, or I was hurting him! We got back together, this time things were different, I felt I could never be with anyone but him! I didn't care what happend as long as we were together,. He didnt let me hang out with any of my guy friends! So I said well then you cant hang out with yours. It was kinda like a rule between us! It was hard because I had alot of guyz friends, But somehow I blew them all off! I was happy with Jeff, that worked for awhile although he still didnt trust me! I always felt like something was up. Why didnt he trust me? I never really did anything wrong. I felt is he doing something wrong!? So things would happend between us and I would run to one of my freinds *guy* and then we would make up! He didnt trust me even more, he said I broke the promise that I wouldn't talk to my guy friends! So he didn't trust me even more!!! Through all this I was feeling lost! Confused! and In love! I didnt think anything was wrong! One night we broke up, I though it was for good, It was new years, I got wasted exstremely I was at the point where I didnt care, what I was doing, I had never been so drunk, it so happend that I was there with a freind of mine that was a guy, he was gorgeous, I ended up doing things with him that I shouldn't have!! The next morning I didnt remember much of anything, He had to tell me everything we did. I was so scared. I came home from that weekend so ashamed. I hadnt been with anyone but Jeff for almost a year and even before that I didn't do anything with guyz. Jeff asked me what happend, I didn't tell him the truth, I was scared, horrified I knew if I told him he wouldnt except that. We ended up getting back toghether and I told him! He was Mad, he yelled and yelled at me for lieng and doing that. I know it was wrong, but I did it and couldnt take it back. We stayed together, but he never lets me forget what I did. Even though he did the same thing, A few months went by and He ended up moving away to montana to go to some school for Welding, we were still together! After about 2 months of him being there I was feeling different, I hadnt had my Pierod! I was getting sick and sleeping alot, I was also really moody! While he was gone, I hung out with my best guy friend he didnt like him at all! He was my best freind tho! he took me to get a pregnancy test, the results told me I was PREGNANT! I didn't know what to do, It wasn't planned even if it was, I was to young. I'm only 16, I didn't have time in my life for a kid, I currently wasnt even in school. I didnt know what 2 do.. I called Jeff and told him he was really excited, I was to but I was scared. It didn't seem true, I didnt want to have a baby with this man I had so many problems with, Even though I did. My feelings were so mixed, he was happy. He had already told his mom and everything, She was ok with it. REALLY SHOCKED, But who wasn't. I deceided from the beggining that I was going to Keep it! Jeff came down on Vacation from his schooling and we had the best of time it was so amazing seeing him, we had the best time, I was like 4 months pregnant, and my babies dad was there with me. We had so much fun, we were never apart. We didn't get into any arguements and if we did they were solved within that 15 mins. Infact, he had he asked me to marry me, In front of my mom and sister, It was amazing. I said yes, being so excited thinking everything was going to be alright.. We had alot of fun for like 4 days.. until.. One night, it was odd, we were supposed to hang out and he wouldnt he wanted to hang out with his friends. I was ok with it, Kinda sad but I mean why hang out with me the whole time right? I didnt want to sounds controlling, I just wish we all could have hung out like we did the times before. Moving on. The next day, was out child first ultrasound. I was so excited the next morning I met him there. He didn't seem happy, I was extremely happy. So I couldnt understand why he would change. Before the ultrasound, I asked him what was wrong, he told me he wasnt ready to have this kid with me. I was shocked, I mean it was allittle to late. But I was ok, I guess I was going to keep it, even tho I was realy hurt. We watched the ultrasound, It was the happiest moment of my life! I saw my Baby Boy for the first time. Then afterwords he sat in the doctors office with me, I told him that no matter what I was going to have our son. Jeff told me that He was going to be there, then he told me that He didnt think we could be together. I freaked out! I cried so much in the damn doctors office! He told me I didnt make him happy, Which wasnt true, I was so depressed I didnt know what to think. I didnt know wha ti had did wrong! The whole day I was crieng, He left three days after that, I saw him once to pick of my stuff at his house. I tried to hang out with him as friends but I couldnt do it. I cried so I had to leave. After that I was determent that I woudlnt be with him ever again, and he would never ask me back, and even if he didtn I woudlnt. I didnt talk to him for a week. Then he called me, I told him we couldnt be toghether. He told me that he missed me, And he was sorry. He even told me that was the worst mistake he had ever made. I kinda fell for him. I didn't want him to hurt me again, since I trusted him with my future and my life. I didnt get back with him, but I talked to him about getting back together! And heres Were I am now. I'm currently 7months Pregnant working full time and schooling idependent. I really want my life to be good for me and my son! Jeff is also a Big factor in my life, Were not 2gether but We talk about. I dont know anymore I don't want to be hurt, we argue something still on the phone. I know we could make it, we just dont try!! And when we do he gives up on me to fast. He did really give up on me.. I dont know where go to! I know hes going to be there for our son, and I know hes going to be a great father. I love him with all my heart, Even though he shatterd it! He wants me back, I dont know if I should take that chance. Were currently in a arguement now. He once again told me that we went going to work, because we fight to much. Its not going to last long. Maybe this is were I should stop! I want to, but I dont know if I can.. I have been through so much with this kid. I don't want it to stop! I want us to be happy like were in the beggining, yet I dont want to get hurt! I'm lost right now.. My heart is broken, I don't show my feeling but I truly am!. I dont want to loose the love of my life! I also dont want to put stress on my Son. I just want to be happy! Thats the short story of my LOVE life!
Written by Broken_Heart
Submitted by Broken_Heart |  |
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