 | I love James. I feel something better, something stronger, more
powerful, than I have with any other guy, any other person. Ever. I
feel as if I need to be with him every second of every day. Always.
Though I have never met him I feel a connection stronger than anything
I have ever known.And one that continues to grow stronger every time I interact with him. As if knowing him has put me at the very top. Of everything. I feel as if he is the most important thing in the world.
Like Batman. And I have the honor of being Robin. I feel if he died I
would dissapear into thin air. As if he was in terrible pain I would
be feeling something equally as strong (though I know this to be
untrue as he has endured much more than I have). I guess this is the
closest I can come to describing how I am feeling. Though the feeling
is undescribable. I love James. All of me every part of me feels as if it exists only to be with James. I feel as if no love could possibly be stronger, or more true.
I dunno what to write. I've written about how much I love him. How much I wish I could SAY it to him how it means so much more that way. How I wish I could SEE him and instantly know if he has had a bad day a good day a secret a suprise or what and why. How I can lean on him when I am tired. Call I'm when I'm lonely. Comfort eachother when one is sad. Cry on his shoulder. Let him cry on mine. Snuggle up to him on the couch and watch a movie. Make out in the movie theater, on the beach, anywhere. Have his much larger hand grasp mine and hold it as we walk or talk or sit or drive or ride or whatever. Have him hug me
close to him when I need a hug or when he needs one. At p*ol. Or even just sit somewhere and talk. Talk and hugs and kisses and hands and Love. Love thats what this is really all about. I love James. Love is the ultimate purpose of our lives.
Well that and reproduction lol. But without love nothing else means
anything. It doesnt matter if you like Nilla Wafers or hot cheetoes
or rock climbing or hangliding or animals or anything. Nothing
matters. Not without love. Sharing your deepest thoughts. Your
darkest secrets, your worst moments, funny things that have happened to you, scary things. People need this. You can but it is not
reccomended sharing these things with people you dont love. I
wouldnt mind if James asked me what my deepest darkest scret was. If
some guy off of the street asked me I would freak. I dont even know
what my deepest darkest secret is lol. It sounds good though doesnt
it? But once I get a deep dark secret I wouldnt mind telling someone
I love. Someone like James. James. Because you do not keep secrets from people you love. I mean you can keep a surprise birthday party a
secret but you get my point. People you love become an extention of
yourself. Someone that knows you as well or better than you do. Who
know exactly what you are going to say before you do. Some one who
can tell what flavor of icecream you want without asking. Someone who
knows that your dog has died and exactly which one just by looking at
you, even before you tell them. Or by your voice over the phone. A
closness like no other. Not like twins or parents or anything.
Nothing is like this. I know that after I meet James and we learn
eachothers voices and faces over a few days. We will be so incedibly
close that I will not be able to tell myself who is who. Which
memories are mine and whih are his. We will be as close as I
described above. From that point forward until the day I die I will
be able to tell how his day has been. if he has a headache a
stomachache or what just by looking at him. If he is thisty what he
wants to drink. Forever closeness. Forever.
Written by Sulker
Submitted by Sulker |  |
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