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Steph's blog

 

I can See

You think I don't see but I do.
You think I don't notice but I'm not that young.
I notice all the blank stares and the prolonged silences.
I your head bent because you are crying.You never were all that great at lying.
Your face is worn and drawn.
A shutter blocks out the laughter that once sparkled in your eyes.
When you laugh it's a false attempt to grab happiness.
And you fall back into that silent despair.
Even when you smile it doesn't cover the sadness.
You used to paint the world with bright vibrant colors.
Because that was your life and the lives of those around you.
We were all blank canv*sses dying to be touched by your happiness.
But now you only paint in black and white.
And our canv*sses are left blank.
Your head begs for happiness but your heart denies it.
And in so doing denies happiness to the rest of us.
This time last year it was warm and sunny and i would se you humming as you planted those lovely flowers.
Then during those late summer evenings after all the work
was done I would hear you talking and giggling with him
just like children.
But now the seaons have changed and the weather mimicks
the sadness we all feel.
There are no flowers in the bed this year, instead there is only chilly fog and cold wet soil.
You sit instead in the living room next to his chair, staring
blankly at the TV.
I want so bad to make you whole again. I don't know you anymore.
I just want you back again.
Your body's here but he left your soul torn in strips and left
them hanging on those would be happy, green branches
of spring.
A soul too torn to mend.
You think I don't see but I do.

Submitted by Steph
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